My Life In A Blender

I wake up at 6:45am. By 7:49am, I am in my car heading down my apartment driveway to get to work by 8am. At 7:56am, I clock in at work, walk to the "secret room" to get the till key. I unlock the conference room door, turn on the lights, open the main door, turn the radio station knobby to "4" (loud enough so I can hear it over my mini space heater), grab the newspaper that the CFO gets every morning and put it in his box, and make a couple pots of coffee before everyone comes sliding in sideways in a hectic panic for their morning caffeine. As I walk down the halway to come to work in the morning, the phones are already ringing off the hook. I already want to pull my hair out just hearing them. It's no wonder I hate talking on my OWN phone. I seriously...hate phones...especially ones with 7 lines. Ugh. So I sit down to calm down the flock of calls, take care of the furious customers who didnt get their deliveried or what have you, and this all goes on for about an hour...actually...this goes on all day. ...Most of the people who call, are people from our other offices, and when they do actually call- they spend 10 minutes from the time I pick up the phone trying to remember who they called while there are 6 other lines going off the hook in the background. Each phone line rings twice, after the second ring, it rings in the back office...and if that happens, I get yelled at.

While the phones are ringing off the hook, I have a stack of old open invoices I have to delete. To complete these, it takes about an hour- so WITH the phones going nuts- it's double time. Ridiculous. I still want to pull my hair out. As we speak, it has been about 2 minutes since the phone has rang- that's a record. What's even funnier is as soon as I made that comment- three lines went off. Anywho, so I am deleting these invoices- staring at a computer screen, doing the same repetative movement for an hour or so. In the meantime, everyone is opening my door asking me if I could make another pot of coffee (which wasn't in the job description, mind you). So, I get up, gently (slam) my papers down and briskly (slowly, and angrily) get to the kitchen to make my children their coffee. They're so cute because even when I put up a sign telling them to turn the pots off if they are below half full or empty- they still do it...and they break, and the coffee burns- and I get the shotty looks. Barf.

While all of this nonsense continues, I have customers pulling up into the parking lot, which takes them 20 minutes to park because the parking lot is small and they cant seem to figure out how to get between the lines. They come in to pick up an order. So they issue is, I have to either call out to two different places to get them to bring up the order- the problem is- in order for them to hear me, I have to scream. Yeah, I said it...literally yell into the phone like a fool.

Then there's the dry ice fiends. I don't know what it is about the phrase "dry ice", but I want to cringe every time I hear it. Everyone wants it- and they think this is the only place to buy it- then they get mad at me when I tell them we do not accept credit cards, lol, like it's my fault.

While all this is happening, I have about 7 or 8 windows open in the bottom of my computer screen trying to finish my math or sociology homework. I have a handy-dandy lil headset so I can answer the calls with a simple push of a button, without having to slam the phone down and pick it back up every time. I like it. It seems to keep me slightly sane. It actually helps a lot. I'm in love.

While all of this is going on, I am dancing in my chair because I have drank 4 cups of coffee and in order to use the restroom, I have to have someone take charge of the "dear, sweet phones." I wish there was some button I could push that just put them on hold until I was available to pick up. This is getting to be a pretty big company- and frankily- one person answering all of the telephone calls to this joint (moi), is entirely one too few.

Finally, 1 o'clock rolls around- lunch time. One hour of pure bliss. Food, visit with the fam, get some fresh air. Good stuff.

I come back at 2, and do my half of the deposit and once that is done, I spend the rest of my work day doing homework while answering the phones and assisting customers with their pick-up orders.

Once my work day is over, it is my stress relief time at the gym- I either run on the treadmill half time and run on the bike the other half, or I go to kick boxing two days a week.

After that, I go shopping for my food, toiletries, what have you. Then I go home, unpack it all, wash my stinky smelly gym clothes, make some quick dinner (usually soup), and finally wind my night down with some more studying, then talking to the boyfriend.

REPEAT. The alarm goes off at 6:45am.

Soooooooooo anywho. I'm just sayin'.

Thanks for reading.

Till next time...

~H3

Today, I am thankful for: KFC, $2 bills, late night YMCA staff to unlock my Kick-Boxing room because I forget my rings on the window sill. Ha.

A Rude Awakening.

I am growing up...much older than I was when Barbie Jeeps and Baby Bottle Pops were a must-have. My goal is to go to a different college (those of you who know what's going on know which one I am talking about, but for the sake of online safety, I will not disclose it's location.) My goal is to live somewhere else for now (and you know where), so that I may save up enough money so that I can afford to go to school there. Is anyone planning on paying for my housing while I go to school there? Those people who are now judging me, starting rumours, elaborating and steering from the truth...do they plan on paying my rent when I go off to this college? Most likely not- as I have been paying my own housing for the last year + now.

Unfortunately, in order for me to get my degree and to get accepted in to the Dental Hygiene program, I will be taking 20+ credits A TERM. In order to get accepted into the program, you must be full-time, committed and determined. I am done feeling guilty. There is no guilt left in me. I have decided that I need to do what is best for my future and my current conditions. There is no where else for me to go. I will not continue to live in a place that sucks if not all, most of my full-time paycheck...when I am only there long enough to sleep in the place. I am sorry for the people (Grandma and Grandpa especially) who are forced to hear the wrong side of the story- and for thinking I am moving there for all the wrong reasons. I am going by what I need to do...and someday, when the lies are done being told, and the stories and rumors that are floating about have left the table (like the Telephone Game), and I finally have my degree, those of you who feel I am making a bad choice will then be proud of me. You have always been proud of me, and there is no reason to stop now. There is nothing wrong with my decision. There are people (and most of you know who) who are telling stories and blowing things out of proportion. Jealously is clearly an issue- there's no denying that- and we all know it. I have lived my life as a God fearing person, and I will continue to do so. There have been complaints of me not seeing certain people on a regular basis or spending time with those certain people- but the reality of it all is- over 80% of my graduating class have moved away to go to bigger and better colleges that I could not afford. Their families are LUCKY to get to see them on Christmas and Spring break- alone. Even then- a phone conversation is a rarity.

If everyone cared about my life as much as they care about this extremely stupid and ridiculous situation that has recently come up- you all would know that I am busy, even now, working full-time and trying to do homework, studying, and preparing for exams- by making a scene out of a nothing scenario only puts more pressure and stress on me...much more than anyone my age should handle. If you want me to be successful, you'll let it go. I will not pass this term if I cannot focus on my schooling- and money will be wasted- and I do not want that. We all know, when we stop and think about it, I have no where else I could go...realistically. The option arose-and I took it. I want to save money so that I can better myself and go to college! I want to do that more than anything- why can't people understand? Oh there is just so much I could say to back myself up it's almost annoying.

I played out the pro's and con's- and I have made my decision, and it is this: I am moving; I am going through with it. I have prayed about it and I feel this is the best decision for me to make. If it were wrong, God would have stopped me dead in my tracks- and at this point- the gate is wide open and welcoming. I am moving to where I can financially afford to save up the money I need to go to school. Unless someone steps up to the plate and offers to pay all of my college fees (since they will be quadruple what they are now), and living fees, I will silence myself. However, as I get older, I want to do more and more on my own- and that way it shall stay. I want to do it on my own for the sake of saying I did it on my own when this is all over with. No one, or no one thing will make me change my mind otherwise. I am tired of living my life in fear of what someone will say or do...or fear of failing certain people. I am a good person, and I always have been. My morals and values have brought me this far- and they're not about to disappear. For the record, I am not Peter Pan. Unfortunately (but fortunately for me), I have to grow up. I have been out of my parent's house for over a year now. It was good timing when I did, because everyone knows I was not happy and was constantly struggling for freedom.

I am an adult now (and legally have been for some time), and from here on out I will only get older. And another thing- since nobody knows- I will be paying rent there, too. ...Only FAR less than what I am now. I am tired of seeing all of my hard-earned money go into nothing. All of it. Living paycheck to paycheck is a joke. I have tried it all. I have tried getting a roommate- I've even gone so far as to ask people who I haven't seen or talked to since kindergarten, or people I have met once or twice- because I was that desperate to get approval from my family. I am done trying to please anybody and everybody. So it is time for me to do what I need to do. There is nothing more to say. I will not be changing my mind, because it would only mean my future is at stake. And until the day comes when the people who resent me for it now realize this, I have nothing more to say to anyone. Holding a grudge will not hurt anyone but you.

Thanks for reading.

~H3

*Today, most of all, I am thankful for: A loving and caring God who sees me for what and who I am, and gives grace in all things- who shows me that there is more to life than trying to live up to other people's standards- who gives me strength and courage day in and day out- who has opened my eyes to a future that is bright, plentiful and blessed- who has given me friends who are understanding and God fearing-who has give me the opportunity to walk in other peoples shoes and to see things the way others see them- but most of all- who has given me the ability to

forgive and forget.

I'm Taking A Rubber Mallot To My Phone.

Honestly? Could this phone ring more? Seriously? Can all seven phone lines fill up any faster? I'm about to go insane. This is also, mind you, day like 3 million that I have had these severely ridiculous head pains. I think I'm gonna die. If I do die, this is my will as follows:

Credit Card Debt: n/a.

Quad: my little sister Melanie.

Car: my little sister Melanie.

Laptop: my little sister Melanie.

Guitar Hero: Jared. (cause he's my brotha rock.)

Stinky Sweaty Gym Clothes: Good Will (cause we all know they will sell it for twice the original cost).

Socks (toes socks included): my little sister Melanie.

Shower Cap: my best friend Rachel. (just cause she got me one in Mexico.)

...And well, I guess that's all I am good for. So, upon the arrival of my death, I wish to be cremated and my ashes mixed with a Sonic Cherry Limeade (or Pumpkin Spice Latte from Starbucks! Mmm. See yesterday's blog entry for details) and spread throughout the Oregon Dunes. Yes, please.

Now that we have that covered, on to the good stuff:

I must say that I am incredibly excited for snow. Believe it or not, I am preparing myself to go ice skating. Yes, that's what I said. And no, I have never gone. My goals in life are few but important. Someday, I hope to go to DisneyLand, Paris, Vegas, Australia, Hawaii, Mexico. Ah, let's just get a round trip ticket around the globe (is that possible?) Could you just imagine how much a ticket of that mass cost? My entire 401k? Which, brings me to another complaint, but I will save that for another day. Let's just say, at this point, social security will be squashed upon my coming retirement age.

Andddd another thing. Let's talk: dirt rain. Yes, it is possible, and yes, my little town did indeed suffer from it. I awoke from my slumber this morning (or lack there of) and out the door I go for yet again, another day at the office, only to find my car cover is soot. Now, I know I let my car get beyond unreasonably filthy, but let's face it- it can only get so bad before even the dirtiest of mall rats get sick of looking at it. I remember it being dirty, but not this bad. So I get in my car and blast the windshield wipers- only to smear the sludge further. Good news was, apparently, I was not the only one suffering from this disease, but my fellow co-workers (and the entire county) as well. It was gross. Luckily, it rained again and fortunately for us, it was clean and powerful enough to wash away the...whatever it was. It looked like some cowboy/hick/get r done/cattle hurdlin' stud muffin had his bottom lip cascading with Grizzly tobacco chew and just blew chunks across the globe. Stupid hill-billys.

I love you guys, really....I do....just keep it in your lip.

Well, that's all for now. No Brad Pitt, six-pack showin' hunks today. Just a nice pack of Grizzly. Till tomorrow....

~H3

*Today, I am thankful for: Excedrin Migraine, Ebay, ridiculously large coffee cups, Sally Hansen Hard As Nails and ATV oil (20-50 solution.) Yeahhh buddy.

...By the way: Firestone smells like a jellyfish. I'm just saying...........they suck, don't do business with them.

Crying Shame.

I start my morning off groggy...and it feels just like a Monday morning- only, this is Wednesday. Ugh. So I manage to flop myself outta bed and onto the cold carpet (is there such a thing? I'm only jealous because most good writers manage to mention the "cold hard floor"- but I have carpet- so...yeah.) Anywho, so I get ready fairly quick, most likely because I skipped my morning "MySpace check". I decided to hit the local Starbucks for a Honey Latte. Now lemme tell you what: these things are a God-send. Amazing, nonetheless, expensive, so it had better be good. I come along skipping ever so cheerfully up to the register and prepare to make my selection. Then it hit me: my worst nightmare. (It couldn't have gotten any more worse, really.) They discontinued the Honey Latte. The barista told me this with his cheeseball, toothy grin/smirk and I just about hit the floor. I would have hit the counter in front of me if weren't blocking my ever so dramatic exit. I stare blankly at the man...for quite some time actually. As the line expanded with more hopeful dramatics, the man, Chris was his name, forced me to decide upon something else. Terribly unsatisfied, yet parched, I make a new selection. Pumpkin Latte. Yes. It was close enough. It was rivaled with the Honey Latte last year, so I figured it must have beat the consumer reports. My experience with this sludge was that the barista put on whip cream and the whip cream turned to chunks and settled down at the bottom of my cup so that with every single sip, I choked...tasted like a wax ball. Gross. But, reluctantly, I gave it another shot- and make darn sure- that whip cream was not present. I waited at the other end of the booth and tapped my heels impatiently, while checking the time on my Palm. He scoots the Latte across the counter- and I take the first sip. YUM! HOLY COW! DELICIOUS! MORE! YES PLEASE! Seriously, absolutely divine. I highly recommend. America- great job, for once in a long time, you have made me proud. Way to rule out that Honey Latte. So now, this infamous Pumpkin Spice Latte is officially number one on my charts. For a Venti, however, you're looking at roughly $4.10. No joke. I almost threw up a lil in my mouth, too. So make sure before you depart your local Starbucks location, you investigate the flavor first.

So now, I sit here...flipping through a US Weekly magazine to only be, yet again, disappointed. The man I once loved, adored, admired, and drooled over, failed me. On page six of the October issue: it hit me. Brad Pitt. O dear, Brad Pitt (moment of silence.) ......... Yes, well. So I read this article that he and Angelina Jolie refuse to be married until everyone had the right to marry. So he donates $100,000 for gay rights. Why Brad?!? Why?!? Is this just an excuse to avoid marrying Angelina so that you may marry me?!? Miss Ellen DeGeneres and her "significant other" Portia de Rossi claim that they are "thrilled to have his support." I bet you are. You see, the way I see this whole issue is, well, it's ridiculous and asinine. There are many people for gay marriage, and I, for one of the many that don't am more than willing to tell you why. For one, the obvious, I am a Christian. I believe God put Adam and Eve here for a reason. It was not Adam and Tom or Eve and Persephone. It was Adam and Eve. Man and woman. Now you can say that it shouldn't matter who a person wants to love- but I say it does. What if, by some crazy slim chance, that every single child from here on out is "born" gay? The world, as we know it would slowly, but surely, come to an end. It is unnatural- and to me and many others, just gross. I do know a few gay people, and I adore them! Terribly nice and friendly people- but that doesn't make it right. You can be a drug addict and be the nicest person, yet still be in the wrong. To make a long story short: Brad, you disappointed me...and I am no longer your fan.

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I take that statement back...but I am irritated.
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For now, I am cool, calm and content. I have an iced tea next to me, a belly full of a Caesar grilled chicken salad and I am ready and pumped for kick-boxing class tonight. We will see what else I can find to complain about tomorrow or what have you. Till tomorrow...


Thanks for reading.


~H3


*Today, I am thankful for: The book "This Present Darkness" by Frank E. Peretti, Pumpkin Spice Lattes, no-slip hair ties, and postage stamps (to go on my Voter registration pamphlet! Heck yes.) Look out O'Bama: I'm gonna make sure your face never even sees the coffee maker in the White House.